


Iridescence

by mochimochilove



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Humor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-29
Updated: 2019-10-29
Packaged: 2021-01-06 09:09:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,614
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21224102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mochimochilove/pseuds/mochimochilove
Summary: Upon which we see the musings of Nekoma’s setter when he realizes his first real crush





	1. Subtle Beginnings

His eyes subtly flit back and forth between the blackboard and the wispy, stray strands of hair poking out of the top of your head. You always did have slightly unkempt hair. Not too messy to be distracting, but definitely not in tip top shape like with a lot of the other female students.

_Ah. She's swaying side to side again. _

He watches a bit more intently, silently thanking the deities of the universe for having him be arranged to sit right behind you in class. He would have never bothered to look close enough otherwise. 

You continue to subtly sway and fidget in your seat, moving along to the rhythm only you can hear. A small part of him wanted to just grab both your shoulders and have you sit still, since he thinks that the teacher was starting to notice you. But a bigger part of him wanted to keep observing your small antics.

He HAD been, actually. For the past 3 months or so.

You were by no means a head turner, unlike the famed silent beauty from Karasuno. You weren’t exactly a stellar student either, and neither did you walk with the popular crowd. If you were a character in some manga, you’d be the type to be drawn in with minimal detail. Not to be focused on. Just there. Existing.

You weren’t especially friendly either. In fact, if he had to pick a word to describe you, it would be **awkward**. Your weird but slightly entertaining hand gestures. Your ever-changing facial expressions which react to almost anything you encounter. The way you tried to hold conversations, but visibly had difficulty with keeping up small talk. Your loud, unadulterated laughter. You didn’t have a very feminine laugh. In fact, it was probably one of the main things about you which first got his attention. Your laugh sucked. It sounded like some weird pervy old man’s laugh. But it was your laugh _ (And he liked it)_.

Oh wow he really HAD been paying attention huh? He mentally kicks himself for unwittingly being endeared by this random, awkward classmate of his.

He didn’t like the butterflies in his stomach. He’d digest the annoying fluttering insects of he could, metaphors be damned.

He didn’t like how sweaty his hand would get when you would turn around to pass him the handouts for class.

He didn’t like how he could only seem to choke out a word or two whenever you tried to make small talk with him.

“Hey. Did it hurt when you got your hair bleached?”

_Yeah. It hurt like a bitch. Thanks for asking._ “…k-kinda.”

“Only kinda? You know I had my hair bleached once in the summer? I felt like I died for a solid 10 minutes.”

_Why did you dye it black again?_ “Oh.”

“Yeah I’m pretty sure it’s why I’ve been doing bad at math recently.”

_Nah. You’ve been bad at math ever since I knew you._ “A-ah. Yeah.”

“…ooookay imma head to the cafeteria now. Bye Kozume-kun!”

“Ok.” _Sweet baby jesus that went horribly. Please come back._

Yep. He doesn’t like having crushes. Not at all. Not. One. Bit.

Well okay.

Maybe he does. A little bit. A tiny bit.

He likes that he actually has something to look forward to in class now. He’d always just tolerated class, listened enough to pass the exams, and zoned out as much as he could without getting caught. Kenma was a particularly quick learner in both games and academics. He could have honestly made it to the college prep class if he’d actually wanted to. But Kenma knew better. College prep classes meant advanced lessons, more pressure to succeed, more expectations. The choice was obvious for him, who wanted nothing more but to simply get by in life. Nothing more and nothing less. So here he is. (Technically) with you. And he likes it.

He likes that he’s not completely invisible to you. That his passive self has somehow managed to wiggle his way into your world. He didn’t even have to try. You weren’t ESPECIALLY friendly, sure. But you were weird. Weird and talkative. You sucked at small talk, but to compensate, you instead would bring up the most random topics and wait for anyone to bite. Oh he bit. He bit HARD every chance he could get. Even if he could only choke out pathetic semblances of replies and comments.

“Hey. Kozume-kun.”

It was your 15 minute break time in the morning. You were sitting backwards on your chair, legs brought up and crossed in an indian sit, facing him. You rested your chin on your left arm, which was folded on top of your chair’s back rest. Meanwhile your right arm was reaching lazily over to his chair, your hand tracing idle shapes on his desk.

He was trying so hard not to sweat. Or visibly turn red. Or pass out really. You always had the habit of giving your undivided attention to your chosen conversational victims. He pretended to mindlessly scroll down on his phone, avoiding eye contact. He was also VERY aware of how near his hand was to your own.

_Oh. Her hands. She’s got some… small hands. I wonder how soft they are. They look pretty warm too. Her fingernails are nice. Clear nail polish. Huh. Cute. Oooookay, wow I'm a creep. _

"Oy.” You tap on his desk.

“Mm?” He doesn’t dare say any more. He’d probably throw up from all the anxiety if he tried opening his mouth.

“Have you ever noticed how some cats are ugly in a particular way?”

_No. You weirdo._ “What. Um. What way?”

It was a bit easier to get less nervous when you’re answering stupid questions.

“Like... their facial features are correctly proportioned, yeah? But their SKULL.” Your eyes widened comically while you wiggled your fingers in the air for emphasis. “Their skulls are waaaayy too wide for their face. You know? Like their facial features are all smooshed up on the middle of their big, wide skull. Do you think they’re aware that they’re a lil ugly or---”

“Pfff—“ you looked down and saw Kenma’s shoulders _shaking_, his blond locks slightly swaying.

“Yo, hey are you okay?” you asked, craning your neck to get a better view of the setter.

Then you hear the choking sound of someone forcing down their laughter.

“HEY. YOU’RE LAUGHING. HOW DARE YOU?? I WAS SERIOUS.” Your raised your voice, your indignant facial expression further spurring on his laughter.

He was face palming now, laughter in full volume, shoulders still shaking, “Yeah I’m sure you were.” He quipped, hand unconsciously dropping downwards, revealing his still slightly quirked up lips.

“Ooooh.”

He looked up. Shit, were you mad? “W-what?”

His eyes met yours, only to see you owlishly blink at him.

“You’re even more handsome when you smile.” You absently comment, with no hint of teasing or flirting. It was as if someone had just asked you what date it was today.

_Ah shit. What an ambush attack._

His brain blanks out for a second, processing what you had just said. You had already settled back properly into your chair, waiting for the teacher to come in, when he was suddenly slammed head first into the realization of what you just told him. Kuroo had almost sent him to the nurse’s office when he noticed how red Kenma was during their lunch break (yep. He was still blushing till then).


	2. Just for a Change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenma gets just a little bit more conscious

_Handsome. She thinks I'm handsome._

Amidst the incessant background noise of his game, Kenma replayed the words of his classmate as he mashed more buttons. 

_I wonder if I heard her correctly. Did she really say that?_

His character once again wins. He moves to shut down his console and shuffles slowly to his desk. Above his desk hung a small mirror, which he only usually used to catch quick glimpses of his face. Just to check if he wasn't looking too horrible to draw attention or anything. 

Kenma was never the type to obsess over his looks. He deemed himself to be objectively average, which perfectly suited the lifestyle he wanted to lead anyway. All he needed was basic hygiene and a low key appearance (though his long hair did give him a bit of trouble from time to time in terms of staying low key). Yep. That's all he really needed.

_It wouldn't hurt to hear her say it again though right?_

\--------------------------------------

"WOAH. You tied your hair back!" you whispered excitedly _(albeit a rather loud whisper)_, eyes following Kenma as he walked to his seat behind you. He was quite thankful for your subtle thoughtfulness, knowing that you decided to keep your voice down because you knew he would feel uncomfortable with too many eyes suddenly turning to him.

It was still about 10 minutes before classes began, and the room was buzzing with the usual chatter among classmates.

"Y-yeah." He mumbled."Mom said my hair was getting a little bit unruly." 

He could still feel your eyes on him, and he starts to squirm for a bit, unconsciously fiddling at the some of the hair framing his face (which he decided to leave down, he still wasn't ready for the anxiety of tying ALL of his hair back). He hears you give a satisfied hum, and gathers enough courage to make eye contact. 

You flashed him your big toothy grin, flailing your arms for a bit to give him two big thumbs up. "I like it!!" you whisper once again, wiggling your eyebrows up and down.

_dontblushdontblushdontblushPLEASEdontblush_ "Um. Thanks." he mutters, mouth curling into a small smile, eyes quickly looking down at his desk.

You smile once more and finally turn to back to your own desk, going back to the doodle you were making on your notebook before he arrived.

It was his turn to watch you this time.

His eyes scanned your form, which was slightly hunched over, with you focused on your doodling. You were quite a bit on the petite side, which he found that he rather liked. He was, after all, relatively scrawny compared to the guys he was usually with. His eyes wandered further and caught a glimpse of your wrist, moving smoothly across your notebook page as you drew what seemed to be a big curve. You had a pretty wrist, if there even WAS such a thing. 

_Really Kenma? A wrist? You're perving out over some poor, unsuspecting girl's wrist?_, he thinks as he mentally rolls his eyes at himself. Are people really this mushy and ewwy when they _kinda_ like someone?

He shook off his thoughts and went back to silently observing you. Suddenly, you turned to face him. His eyes quickly fell to the ground. 

"Hey, do you have a pencil eraser?" You asked, hand moving to mimic an erasing motion.

He wordlessly reaches for his pencil case and grabs a small, white eraser. "Here." 

You held out your hand, and Kenma decides to purposely hand it a tiiiny bit slowly. Just a fraction of a second slower. He directed his full attention to shape and outline of your pretty _(ugh)_ hand. Your dainty wrist contrasted with his, and the butterflies in his stomach were practically having a rave party.

_Oh my god I'm pathetic. IT'S A HAND KENMA CALM YOUR HIGHSCHOOL BOY BRAIN DOWN._

"Thank you!" you mouth to him as you grab the eraser. He coughs out a quiet "Sure" and leans back on his chair, staring at his own hands while he fiddles with his fingers. He began to think about how annoyingly tiring it was to have a crush. He was already anxious enough as it is, and having you around was just boosting his anxiety levels to 110%. What a pain.

"Woah dude nice hairstyle today!" a classmate behind him suddenly spoke. 

Kenma froze. Of COURSE some of his other classmates would point it out. Damn it he shouldn't have even bothered trying anything new. He began to hear small murmurs from his classmates, mostly good comments, but comments still. Comments meant attention. Attention meant hell. He could feel tiny beads of sweat forming around his forehead as he forced himself to avoid eye contact with anyone. Suddenly he heard the sound of a chair screeching. 

He subtly looks to the side to see you, having already moved to stand by the window. You were peering outside, your face squashed against the glass. 

"Guys what the fuck there's a totally fat bird here trying to fly! Look he can barely lift himself up!" You said, feet going on a tip toe as if to get a better look at the said bird. Snorts and snickers were heard in the classroom as some of your classmates walked over to witness the innocent overweight bird. "I dont see it!", one guy grumbled as he too squashed his face against the window. You rolled your eyes and replied, "You're not looking hard enough. It's the bird which barely looks like it has a neck. It's the fat round bird. Can't you see?". The classroom was now back into a neutral buzz of conversations. You glance at Kenma for a short second and give him a small smile. He lets out a breath he's been holding. 

_Did you do that on purpose? Did you actually care enough about him to make that effort?_ His mind raced. He sees you shuffle back to your seat after bickering with the guys who hoped to actually see a struggling fat bird. _Should he thank you? Would it be weird to thank you? Was he just assuming things? _ He unconsciously begins to tap his fingers on his desk as he continues his internal debate. A hand, a pretty hand _(Omygod really now?)_ interrupts his thoughts as it comes into view. He looks up to see you give him a big smile. "Thanks for the eraser!" you say, setting the small rubber on his desk. "Y-yes. Thanks. Too. I mean you're welcome. But thanks, I--" he stutters through his words while he struggles to maintain eye contact. Fucking hell you really had no idea what you do to him.

"Pffft. Sure Kozume-san." You snicker, smile going wider. _This is unfair. This is absolutely unfair how she does this every time. I hate your pretty smile and your pretty hands. And your stupid thoughtful actions. I hate your friendly disposition. I hate how much space you take up in my head. Just leave me alone._

"Oh and uh.. you know that social science project we have? Do you have a partner yet? I was hoping maybe we could partner up?" you say, fiddling with your fingers as you lean a bit towards him. 

Kenma's thoughts come to a sudden halt. His eyes widen by a fraction. 

You see his expression and find yourself blushing from embarrassment. "S-sorry I just thought maybe it would be fine. I-it's okay you can totally choose someone else, I'm--" 

"Yeah I'd l-like to partner up." he mumbles, eyes downcast, suddenly finding the floor so very interesting. 

"WHEW okay I'm glad! I'll give you my number after class okay? I'm really excited to work on it!" you say, giving him a final smile and turning back to face the blackboard.

_I hate you. I hate what you do to me. _Kenma sighs and rests his forehead on his desk. His heart beats a little faster though, the stupid little organ probably going wild at the thought of finally getting to have your number. He reaches for his pocket and pats it down, making sure he has his phone ready for later. Yep. He hates you. He really does. 


End file.
